What is it about gay people...
...that pisses some people off as much as it does? There are very heated debates on the subjects of gay marriage, gay adoption, to the point of people saying that children are better off in orphanages than adopted by a gay couple!
Really? Have you ever been in an orphanage? Have you ever looked a parentless child in the eye and told him "You're lucky you're here. You could have had two dads, that would have been a whole lot worse!". Even assuming that you go to the best maintained orphanage in the world, with the staff that treats the children in the best possible manner (...but really, trust me when I tell you, in most of the orphanages around the world, children are treated horribly and live in the most abject of conditions), even there you will have probably one person to tend ten children at a time at least. How much time is there for love and affection when you have to tend to that many children on a regular basis? How many of those children are really feeling loved?
Going back to the treatment of gay people, I will quote my own post:
" I would like to establish that gay people are people. That means that they have the same rights as all the others (no more, but no less), same right to be upset as anyone would be when someone posts a public post saying that they are "anomalies" and so on."
Let's start with that: gay people are people. I feel like most people arguing against homosexuality, don't really get that. Gay people do things that normal people do: they wake up in the morning and go to work. They love other people. They have feelings like other people. They occasionally fuck up like other people. The only difference is that they sleep with people of their own gender rather than the opposite one.
So what's offensive about that? Oral sex is practiced regularly in heterosexual couples, I have not yet heard someone upset about that. While I am not aware of any survey done on the subject, I would venture a guess that anal sex is less frequent, but most guys I know find it an exotic way to have sex and would at least try it to see how it is. Even if they would not try it, I have never heard a guy angry at another guy for practicing anal sex or oral sex with his girlfriend, while when it comes to gay couples, it's "depraved". Why the double standard, really?
"I don't want my child to see that" is another line I've heard often. Do you really think that a child would become gay by seeing two gay people being a public couple? And no, by a public couple, I don't mean having sex on the streets - that's against the law regardless of your sexual orientation! I am talking about the simple act of two guys holding hands without people treating them like dirt. Is that really so much to ask?
"Sex is about procreation". Really?! In the Western world few couples nowadays have more than two children. That's because we learned from history that quality is more important than quantity - and when you have less children you have more time to give to each child. And as already established in the previous paragraphs, time with a child is very important to make that child feel loved. So, we live in a society where less is more and a large number of children in a family is a less and less common occurrence. Are you seriously telling me that all these people arguing about sex and procreation stopped having sex after they decided to not have children anymore (or decided to not have children at all, as there are many in that category too)? Are you telling me none of them ever masturbated or had sex with condoms or other types of contraception? I know that some religious people are arguing that all of the above is sinful, but many of the people that argue the procreation argument are not religious and would never think of being angry at a heterosexual couple for having sex just for the fun of it, without the intent of creating a child.
"It goes against nature". What is nature? A century ago you still had people arguing that nature means for women to be inferior to men. They argued that it was unnatural for a woman to have an occupation other than raising children and managing the household. Oh heck, you still have some people arguing that now. How many of you really believe that women are inferior to men? If there are some of you out there reading this and really believing that, don't hide. Come out and say it. Debate it and bring valid arguments to your belief. But most people that argue against homosexuality with the "nature" line don't believe women inferior to men. So can we not agree that the idea of "nature" is just a concept of society that tries to define normality based on our own perceptions? Can we not agree that the idea of "nature" evolves as we learn to deal with the people that are different from us? Can we not accept that just as we now know that epileptics are not possessed by the devil, homosexuals simply are different? Also, going back to the previous paragraph, does not wanting children at all go against nature? If yes, why are there no people berating childless couples?
Articles are cited about gay people abusing children (which goes back to the adoption argument). Even ignoring that most of those articles come from dubious sources of far-right publications, can we not see that being a pedophile does not depend on sexual preference? I have read plenty of articles about heterosexual people raping children, no-one drew a conclusion that all heterosexuals are pedophiles based on that! Yes, pedophilia is wrong (and no, nothing like homosexuality, because as mentioned in my other gay-related post, "children [...] are not in a position to truly agree to what is happening" unlike in the case of homosexual sex where you have two consenting adults). Pedophilia is wrong, whether homosexual or heterosexual and accepting gay people is not a step to accepting pedophilia, as they are two very different things.
"I don't like them". That is fine. That is your right. There are a lot of people we don't like, based on various criteria. That doesn't take away their right to exist and carry on with their lives, just like the things that make you different from the rest of the world (and there are some, no matter how well you keep them hidden - and you know it), don't take away that right from you.
Let us be clear. I am not arguing for positive discrimination. My views on that can be read in this post but can be summarized in one sentence: the end of discrimination is not reached by maintaining different treatment of different categories of people, it is done by eliminating the perception that those people need to be treated differently (in a good or bad way).
I am arguing for equal rights. As a woman (another category that certain societies discriminate against), I want the following rights:
1. The right to get a job I am qualified for, based on my qualifications alone, without any influence of the gender factor.
2. The right to be treated at my workplace based on my job performance and not my gender.
3. The right to do whatever I want in my own bedroom, provided that whoever is joining me in there agrees with what is being done.
4. The right to marry the person of my choosing, provided that person wants to marry me.
5. The right to adopt a child of my choosing and keeping that child, provided that that child is in a position to be adopted, agrees with being adopted by me and it's not proven that I am guilty of mistreatment and abuse.
6. The right to walk on the street holding my loved one's hand and walking my child without people judging me for it.
These are rights every human being should hold, why is it so hard for us to grant these rights to people of a different sexual orientation?
I will end this rant with one more consideration. Surveys have shown again and again that the quality of life (taking into consideration the happiness of the people that were questioned) is higher in countries like Denmark, than in countries like Russia. If you don't believe surveys, look inside yourself and ask yourself: if you were to change your country of residence, would you be more likely to go to a country like Denmark or a country like Russia?
It is my firm belief that a part of what makes the Western society more functional than its less tolerant counterparts is exactly the fact that people are more open to the idea that each person is different from the other and toleration is better than discrimination. The Nazis lost Einstein by persecuting Jews. That is the kind of thing discrimination leads to. By accepting people based on what they do rather than religion/sexual orientation/gender, you are more likely to find the best people necessary to help your society work properly.
Really? Have you ever been in an orphanage? Have you ever looked a parentless child in the eye and told him "You're lucky you're here. You could have had two dads, that would have been a whole lot worse!". Even assuming that you go to the best maintained orphanage in the world, with the staff that treats the children in the best possible manner (...but really, trust me when I tell you, in most of the orphanages around the world, children are treated horribly and live in the most abject of conditions), even there you will have probably one person to tend ten children at a time at least. How much time is there for love and affection when you have to tend to that many children on a regular basis? How many of those children are really feeling loved?
Going back to the treatment of gay people, I will quote my own post:
" I would like to establish that gay people are people. That means that they have the same rights as all the others (no more, but no less), same right to be upset as anyone would be when someone posts a public post saying that they are "anomalies" and so on."
Let's start with that: gay people are people. I feel like most people arguing against homosexuality, don't really get that. Gay people do things that normal people do: they wake up in the morning and go to work. They love other people. They have feelings like other people. They occasionally fuck up like other people. The only difference is that they sleep with people of their own gender rather than the opposite one.
So what's offensive about that? Oral sex is practiced regularly in heterosexual couples, I have not yet heard someone upset about that. While I am not aware of any survey done on the subject, I would venture a guess that anal sex is less frequent, but most guys I know find it an exotic way to have sex and would at least try it to see how it is. Even if they would not try it, I have never heard a guy angry at another guy for practicing anal sex or oral sex with his girlfriend, while when it comes to gay couples, it's "depraved". Why the double standard, really?
"I don't want my child to see that" is another line I've heard often. Do you really think that a child would become gay by seeing two gay people being a public couple? And no, by a public couple, I don't mean having sex on the streets - that's against the law regardless of your sexual orientation! I am talking about the simple act of two guys holding hands without people treating them like dirt. Is that really so much to ask?
"Sex is about procreation". Really?! In the Western world few couples nowadays have more than two children. That's because we learned from history that quality is more important than quantity - and when you have less children you have more time to give to each child. And as already established in the previous paragraphs, time with a child is very important to make that child feel loved. So, we live in a society where less is more and a large number of children in a family is a less and less common occurrence. Are you seriously telling me that all these people arguing about sex and procreation stopped having sex after they decided to not have children anymore (or decided to not have children at all, as there are many in that category too)? Are you telling me none of them ever masturbated or had sex with condoms or other types of contraception? I know that some religious people are arguing that all of the above is sinful, but many of the people that argue the procreation argument are not religious and would never think of being angry at a heterosexual couple for having sex just for the fun of it, without the intent of creating a child.
"It goes against nature". What is nature? A century ago you still had people arguing that nature means for women to be inferior to men. They argued that it was unnatural for a woman to have an occupation other than raising children and managing the household. Oh heck, you still have some people arguing that now. How many of you really believe that women are inferior to men? If there are some of you out there reading this and really believing that, don't hide. Come out and say it. Debate it and bring valid arguments to your belief. But most people that argue against homosexuality with the "nature" line don't believe women inferior to men. So can we not agree that the idea of "nature" is just a concept of society that tries to define normality based on our own perceptions? Can we not agree that the idea of "nature" evolves as we learn to deal with the people that are different from us? Can we not accept that just as we now know that epileptics are not possessed by the devil, homosexuals simply are different? Also, going back to the previous paragraph, does not wanting children at all go against nature? If yes, why are there no people berating childless couples?
Articles are cited about gay people abusing children (which goes back to the adoption argument). Even ignoring that most of those articles come from dubious sources of far-right publications, can we not see that being a pedophile does not depend on sexual preference? I have read plenty of articles about heterosexual people raping children, no-one drew a conclusion that all heterosexuals are pedophiles based on that! Yes, pedophilia is wrong (and no, nothing like homosexuality, because as mentioned in my other gay-related post, "children [...] are not in a position to truly agree to what is happening" unlike in the case of homosexual sex where you have two consenting adults). Pedophilia is wrong, whether homosexual or heterosexual and accepting gay people is not a step to accepting pedophilia, as they are two very different things.
"I don't like them". That is fine. That is your right. There are a lot of people we don't like, based on various criteria. That doesn't take away their right to exist and carry on with their lives, just like the things that make you different from the rest of the world (and there are some, no matter how well you keep them hidden - and you know it), don't take away that right from you.
Let us be clear. I am not arguing for positive discrimination. My views on that can be read in this post but can be summarized in one sentence: the end of discrimination is not reached by maintaining different treatment of different categories of people, it is done by eliminating the perception that those people need to be treated differently (in a good or bad way).
I am arguing for equal rights. As a woman (another category that certain societies discriminate against), I want the following rights:
1. The right to get a job I am qualified for, based on my qualifications alone, without any influence of the gender factor.
2. The right to be treated at my workplace based on my job performance and not my gender.
3. The right to do whatever I want in my own bedroom, provided that whoever is joining me in there agrees with what is being done.
4. The right to marry the person of my choosing, provided that person wants to marry me.
5. The right to adopt a child of my choosing and keeping that child, provided that that child is in a position to be adopted, agrees with being adopted by me and it's not proven that I am guilty of mistreatment and abuse.
6. The right to walk on the street holding my loved one's hand and walking my child without people judging me for it.
These are rights every human being should hold, why is it so hard for us to grant these rights to people of a different sexual orientation?
I will end this rant with one more consideration. Surveys have shown again and again that the quality of life (taking into consideration the happiness of the people that were questioned) is higher in countries like Denmark, than in countries like Russia. If you don't believe surveys, look inside yourself and ask yourself: if you were to change your country of residence, would you be more likely to go to a country like Denmark or a country like Russia?
It is my firm belief that a part of what makes the Western society more functional than its less tolerant counterparts is exactly the fact that people are more open to the idea that each person is different from the other and toleration is better than discrimination. The Nazis lost Einstein by persecuting Jews. That is the kind of thing discrimination leads to. By accepting people based on what they do rather than religion/sexual orientation/gender, you are more likely to find the best people necessary to help your society work properly.
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